Gang Rapes. What could be the psychology?

3 gang rapes in M.P. region in the last fortnight. The first case involved two innocent tribal girls raped by 18 men from the same village Betma. Two of the rapists had political connections.

In the second case, the unfortunate deaf & dumb woman was attacked by known men in her own house in Depalpur. The woman was totally helpless as they threatened to kill her child.

The third case occurred last night in Indore, when a 25 yr old married woman was returning home with her husband on motor cycle.The husband was carrying Rs 20,000 in cash. In this case, the rapists posed as policeman.

What could be the psychology behind these rapes? Or for that matter any rape? I think it's very important to understand the mentality of the rapists if we have to counter this menace in the society. The Indian courts should deliver immediate judgments so as to bring some fear in the society. The 2 men with political connections should be castrated  and their godfathers be kicked out of the respective parties.

There is something terribly wrong with India. It's a national shame.

 

 

Bomb Blast. We Indians don't feel.

Yet another bomb blast in Mumbai. Looks as though we Indians have accepted terror attacks as a way of life! Quite a difference from how Americans behaved after 9/11 World Trade Center Terror attack in 2001. Every American grieved there. It's not so in India. There is so much of divide between North India & South India, Central India & Western India or Eastern India that nobody is really bothered about what is happening to Indians as a whole.
Naturally, we did not reach anywhere as regards 26/11 terror attack that took place in Mumbai in the year 2008. And I have my own doubts if we will reach anywhere  in our probe this time too.
Hope our younger generation turns out to be more patriotic. This is my sincere prayer.

Long Live SRK. Long Live Courage

My salute to you Shahrukh Khan! You have shown the way. It was not a battle of strength. It was a battle of Right and Wrong. And in spite of tremendous pressure such as -(1) the money incurred in making the film, (2) gambling with the feelings and hard work of everyone associated with the film, you stood and faced the 'bull-ism' of the highest order. The people of India are going to remember you for this.

There is one thing I am going to say, which has been troubling me for the past one month or so. I regret that Mangeshkar Sisters chose to keep quiet on the fanaticism of Bal Thackeray i.e. Shiv Sena. Even when he made disturbing remarks on Sachin Tendulkar-the great Indian Player! Lata Mangeshkar's voice would have sounded sweeter than even the nightingale, if she had checked Bal Thackeray that time. After all she is known to be fond of Sachin Tendulkar. I am sure Bal Thackeray would not have the guts to speak or stand against the great legend. Not just Mumbai, but the entire India and the world would have come down heavily on him then.

Required Urgently Foresight & Problem Solving Skills!

In India, that is to say!

The humiliation of Pakistani Players during IPL selection was coming, wasn't it? At least I am not surprised. The ugly situation could have been avoided, had India acted swiftly and punished those guilty of 26/11 terror attack. It was also not fair for one Daily to talk of peace when the wounds were still raw. It only signified that we were in a hurry to please others at the cost of our own pain.

What is happening in Mumbai is also no surprise. The country should have woken up the first time Bal Thackeray said, "Mumbai is for Marathis". Unfortunately the vote bank was important for the parties then. I always wonder why Bollywood plays so safe. If Ratan Tata could act tough, so could Bollywood! Anyway they are all facing the brunt now.

Education helps us to gauge, analyse, foresee problems and face them squarely. Instead we have ended up learning to connive at every alarming situation. And that's a sad part.

2010.Time to change for the better.

But for the fact that I failed to keep my promise of being regular and punctual, the year 2010 did seem to start on a positive note.

The rising of the Indian people against DGP Rathore is certainly a good and healthy indication. Kudos to Aradhana Gupta, a friend of late Ruchika who fought a relentless battle against the former DGP. The other day, when the legal expert Ram Jethmalani angrily remarked that neither the media nor the people were following any correct procedure. She was quick to reply that a common man does not understand the legal language which is often confusing. I could not help but marvel at the way she kept her cool. This, especially when she saw her friend Ruchika committing suicide because of lack of justice. Yes, here was a young woman in her early 30's who fought the ugly world without giving up.

Well truly, harassment, cruelty and sadism have to be dealt with strongly. Be it a man or a woman. Every human being on this earth has a right to live a life of dignity and happiness. And we don't need a UN to tell us this. We should realize it ourselves.

As I say these big talks, the death of more than 100 people in the recent cold wave in India is shocking. My husband happened to tell me this when I was laying the table for dinner. It was just bad! Afterwords when I sat reflecting on this all, the advice of my father in childhood came rushing to me yet again. "You know, your grandmother was not very learned in the true sense. Probably just First or Second class Pass. But when I picked up my first job she said one thing. Your salary is not yours entirely." Your family, neighbours and those around you have a certain share in it. And I have not forgotten these words!"My father concluded.

Certainly a very difficult thought to understand. I don't remember seeing my grandmother. It must have been somewhere in late 1940's or early 50's when she said this to my dad. But,I really don't think I ever comprehended the meaning. Till I think yesterday when I felt miserable. Somewhere I felt guilty too. Let's face it, I have not been a very good human being. I have been too busy in my own challenges and difficulties to pay attention to others. But maybe I can still help whenever possible? I can always try. For all I know in these deaths, we may have lost some good teacher, scientist, doctor...

Oh God give me the strength and will to rise above myself and do something for my fellow brethren. Amen.

Farewell Amrita Pancholi-IIM Indore Professor

The whole of Indore is shocked at the cruel murder of IIM Assistant Professor,Ms. Amrita Pancholi on Thursday,the 18th of Dec'09. Be it office, or a paan shop (beetle), the talks are only on this these days. Hazaar muh hazaar baten...Something beyond control and most unfair. After all, the death of a single woman aged 32, staying alone in the campus in one of the staff quarters is bound to make a spicy tale.

It is the work of an insider as per the police. And all evidences points to that. Everything will be clear in a day or two. All in all, it is a terrible thing to happen. A high- potential girl who could have contributed a lot towards the society is no more. The repercussions are going to be many. Particularly in a place like Indore where girls had just begun to dream big, this happening is going to scare them in a big way. The parents are also likely to put a halt to their daughters careers. Very much a case of,"One step forward, two steps backward".

This sure makes it imperative to look into the possible reasons for murder. As a working woman, I have often seen how unkindly people talk of single and slightly older women/girls. Students who come from various backgrounds are not to be excluded. There is, in fact, always a lot of curiosity, doubt, as also aspersions cast on working girls. If unchecked, they also take the form of overtures. It hurts to talk like this, but we have lost a precious life here. And something needs to be done fast. It cannot be ignored that in the case of Ms. Amrita, the age gap between her and the students was less. It is also not to be forgotten that students do at times pressurize teachers for marks. Ofcourse, the person does learn to handle it as he/she grows older. But, all these points do need to be taken into account.

Further, justice has to be imparted fast. We can't certainly have Taliban kind of system come into India. The best would be to have an Ombudsman, seperately for students and teachers. The students and staff will also have to be encouraged to go and speak to the Ombudsman once a while. So that any form of wrong behaviour will be nipped in the bud itself. This could help save a person from becoming a criminal and it could also save a person from falling a victim.

But, first in this case let's hope the culprit is caught at the earliest. We can't have a brave girl's story end this way.
Farewell Amrita!

Indore Municipal Corporation Elections- 11Dec. 2009

Yet again, elections are round the corner! The city is well charged. People of Indore will be voting for Mayor and Corporator on Friday, 11 Dec.2009.

Indore bears a festive look these days with processions, loudspeakers, songs and drum- beatings taking a preceding. Whatever! It does liven up the spirits and I feel happy. And so do others I feel. Indore. A city of Festivals. Nay! A city of marriages. If I may say so. For be it rich or poor, marriages take place in an elaborate manner here. But let me come back to the point. Just the other day, while returning from work late in the evening I noticed a lady contestant, with shimmering red 'chunni' over her head, going from door to door asking for votes. At the first glance she did appear a bride to me.

Be it BJP, Congress or the independents, I know everybody's agenda by heart now. "Plenty of water... Cemented paths... Good roads...Development of the city and blah, blah, blah! And that's when my mind shifts to the big challenge we are facing now-Climate Change. But then, I feel sorry for the political parties. I know they have to talk of "plenty of water" to the down-trodden and the ordinary folks, for they are the ones who nurture huge expectations. And, they don't understand environment problems. Besides, they are the ones who vote for sure. So, that's that.

The other day, I told my maid to close the tap when not washing the utensils. An everyday refrain, frankly speaking! She probably had it enough for she spat out," Here you tell me to close the tap, and several times during the day I notice one or the other overhead tank overflowing."(meaning me I know). "I will tell Chowkidar Bhaiya (watchman) to check the tanks more often." I murmur. If only all residents of our colony were careful, the supply would remain in limits. I mutter to myself.

Talking about 'Cemented roads'. My mind races back to what happened a month ago. It was one of those lazy Sunday afternoons. While I and the rest of the residents of our society, were merrily enjoying the afternoon siesta, my husband noticed a group of 3-4 men all armed to dig a big hole in the newly cemented path right outside our Complex. They wanted to insert a pole for a small community function they were organizing there. And that called for a canopy. That was when I was rudely shaken up by my husband's shouting, who also immediately went down to give them a piece of mind. But that makes me think, how long will our cemented path survive?


I belong to the breed of 'Common Man' and I am helpless. But I wish to draw the attention of all politicians to the stray animals- namely cows, dogs, pigs that cause a lot of inconvenience while driving on the roads. I wish something would be done on this regard.

Sans Feeling or Inhuman! We Indians?

My son,who studies at a leading law college, was upset the other day. It seems, an established criminal lawyer was invited to their esteemed institute to deliver a guest lecture. And so some forty odd students, comprising both boys and girls and two lady professors sat listening with rapt attention.

In the course of his lecture, he discussed the various cases he had fought and won. All was well till he came to the part when he said how he had saved a client who had been charged with murder. The advocate mentioned in passing that the man had committed seven-eight murders before that. My son could take no more. "But what about the Professional Ethics, Sir " He asked. The advocate, who was presumably in his thirties replied a trifle annoyed that it was his profession to defend his client. My son couldn't contain himself and so this time addressed the lady professors. But, he was instead asked to sit down.

The Defence Advocate probably felt challenged. And this time he rattled something that was even more obnoxious than before. He said that he had once saved a man charged with raping a minor girl. The man had before that raped seven more minor girls. Surprisingly, in a hall packed with as many girls as boys (not to forget the two lady teachers), there was just one girl who stood up to protest.

Later when my son recounted the horrible tale, I exclaimed with disgust at the rape. It was at that, that my son checked me, "Aai(Mom)! Rape or murder both are bad. In fact any crime is bad. A Defence Lawyer's job is not to save the skin of a criminal but to place a clear picture before the judge. That is what is being done in Kasab's case."

While I felt proud of my son, I don't really know what to say about the rest of the audience particularly the girls and the teachers who allowed the lecture to take place in that manner. I really wonder if our leading Supreme Court lawyers and political leaders such as Kapil Sibal, Abhishek Singhvi, Arun Jaitley, Ravishankar Prasad would also support the lecture? It really makes me think, "Are we as a nation, sans any feeling or just plain and simple inhuman!"

We Indians. A confused lot!

We think, worry, care... so much about ourselves! Our beauty regime, health, salary, promotion. and when it comes to our family, we try to have the best there too! A classy dwelling in a posh colony, an excellent school for our children and what not. And too all very quickly.But we are so distant when it comes to our country. I really don't understand.

There have been floods in Andhra Pradesh, Karnataka and several places but no one is bothered. Several policemen were killed last week by naxalites. A day prior to this Inspector Induvar was beheaded and killed by the same naxalites. But I didn't see anyone even talking about it in the university or the agency where I work. Now we also hear that the same Inspector was on a punishment posting and had not been paid for six months. But, on TV we had the Human Activists refusing to call this an act of terrorism. As per their definition, terrorism is when poor people are deprived of food, etc. Yes, Human Activists! People going without food is bad and we have to work collectively and fast to solve this problem. But, we also cannot have our brave policemen killed this way.I shudder to think how their families must be feeling, while watching others ready for Diwali-the festival of lights.

Much as I respect Mr. Jairam Ramesh, I am surprised at his rhetoric that linking of rivers will be harmful. This one liner makes no sense, especially when scientist and former President Dr. Abdul Kalam, too, has shown considerable interest in this project. I think we Indians are just very, very cool when it comes to solving a problem at the national level. It's not correct...just not correct.

BJP debacle

An agonising week for the entire country as the countrymen witnessed a lot of mud-slinging and accusations.Truly an example of washing dirty linen in public!

I remember what Former President Dr. Abdul Kalam said when proved wrong for dissolving the then Bihar Assembly. He said to the reporter," Well, decisions have to be taken. And decisions can be right or wrong. But we can't let problems win over us. We have to overcome problems." And that's exactly applies to 1947 India-Pakistan Partition. We, born after 1947 do not know and cannot fathom the situation prevalent then! I am sure Mahatma Gandhi, Sardar Patel and Pandit Jawahar Lal Nehru must have studied the scenario before taking the heartbreaking decision. Certainly these leaders were far more patriotic than any of us today. And so I feel these dramatic outbursts must be made to stop. Let the dead leaders rest in peace!

The 1999 Indian Airlines Plane Hijacking was a sordid affair. I do agree that the hijackers could have been caught at Amritsar Airport itself. I blame the Media and the Media alone for the failure. An out- of- control melodramatic situation was created that sent the emotion-strung Indians into a further frenzy. The BJP led government was absolutely nailed to the wall. All the time, the media was citing how political leader Mufti Mohammed's daughter was freed from kidnappers by releasing some anti-social elements.. The government had no answer for this. Or rather, the government chose not to answer the' silly media' for fear of making it a trend.

To combat terrorism, corruption, and malfunctioning, we Indians need to first learn not to get nervous and emotion-strung. A lot needs to be learnt from US, Russia and Israel on this issue-more so the media! Yes, The BJP should stop pushing the blame on one another and move ahead by learning from the mistakes. And if it is very difficult, they should leave the party.

Children are creative. Adults are a bore!

I have been busy again doing proof checking for a school magazine. I shall finish it in 2-3 days time, I guess. But it has been great. And me thinks that boys have outdone girls in expressing their thoughts.

While the girls have largely written emotional poems on mothers and so on, boys have gone all out to write on diverse topics such as an imaginary story of a planet called 'amnecia', 26/11 Mumbai terrorist attack, and so on.

But whatever! The efforts of both boys and girls has been commendable. Most of them have been from classes 9th, 10th, and 11th. And that's what disturbs most. For now, many of them will be forced to join coaching for engineering and medical entrance examination ( If they haven't joined so far!). Thanks to the social and peer pressure. In Indore I find this a bit too much. That I suppose will be the end of their creativity. For, I have done proof checking for college magazines (engineering,etc.). And I find their output very dull in the face of these children.

How I wish a fairy would appear out of somewhere and move her wand over everybody, resulting in adults acquiring higher levels of understanding. This would naturally mean optimum use of human brain, and tremendous good for mankind. But then all our problems are man made and God expects us to solve them ourselves, I suppose.

Truly, children are so creative! And adults are such a bore.

Not exactly arrogant. This younger Generation.

The week has ended with this sweet feeling that all is not wrong with the younger generation! They are an aggressive lot alright. But they do make efforts to understand people like me.

Remember, I had talked about this young executive in my last blog who had messed up in the college magazine? Well it was nice to see her put in extra effort this week. She continues to be a little distant. But then I have decided not to hold any grudges against her.

Talking about the college magazine, it was great fun working on it this week. There were articles on 'Mother', 'Childhood', and so on. Some guys in the agency got down to helping me get good images for the articles. The camaraderie shown was overwhelming to the core. The only problem being that they constantly came up with pictures of 'an ever-sacrificing mother' for the article on mother. And when it came to finding a suitable image for childhood, they only thought of infants in mothers' arms. And so I told them to look for pictures of children playing .

The college magazine contained the Hindi translation of Robert Frost poem,'The woods are lovely dark and deep..' Vikas, our photographer and Graphic Designer liked it so much that he took down the original poem from the internet. He also listened to me when I spoke of the poem 'Good fences make good neighbours' written by the same poet Robert Frost.

And so there was this 'Feel Good' factor through out the week making me forget issues like 'generation gap'. I think it is finally showing patience to one another.

Tough Moments

Sorry guys! There has been a considerable delay in writing this time.

Like you all, I also had some difficult moments in the Agency I work. About 20 days ago, our agency had taken up the work of a college magazine. The work was assigned to an executive who we felt would do the job. Little did we realise that she would sleep over the work and land the entire team in trouble. Which is what happened!

The college professor turned up 4 days ago with 3 of her male colleagues. Neither the 'Cover Page' was ready and nor had the corrections been carried out. Expecting 'setting of the matter' was too far-fetched at this juncture. The young executive decided not to come out. She chose instead to have her lunch pushing all the blame on the newly appointed Trainee Graphic Designer. It was then that I had to step in and apologise while requesting time till 13 July which is tomorrow.

But that's not the end of the matter. The young girl now feels that she is the one who has been wronged. And while spreading all the venom she has also decided to step out of the team.

The girl does not realise that she will never learn anything this way. And next time, we are going to think a hundred times before assigning her an independent job.

It is very important to be honest at work I realise. And it is best to accept a mistake when it is made-- even if it means a little bit of showdown. The difference between failures and successful men lies there I guess!

Kudos to Yashpal Committee! Great Going.

The proposal to dissolve UGC, AICTE, MCI couldn't have been better timed. I salute the members of the Yashpal Committee. And I have a special salute reserved for Mr Kapil Sibal.

1) Indeed with countless engineering colleges coming up all over the country , the B.E degree has lost all the importance that it once had. It has been reported there are several engineering colleges in Chattisgarh, Bangalore and other places which are running in just one room. I really wonder how? No surprise, the engineering giants say that today's engineers are not worth employing!

2)In case of MCI, it is just the reverse! The officiating body is forever finding faults with all medical colleges . As a result, medical colleges are very few in number. This forces the students stay on in spite of severe ragging. This apart, there is always a fear of de-recognition from MCI. In Indore itself there is always a sword hanging on MGM Medical College for lack of PG doctors. From where will the P.G doctors come if just a few colleges run PG course?

Even otherwise, one needs to see the ratio of engineering and medical colleges. If engineering colleges are in lakhs, the medical colleges are barely a thousand something!

3) While restraining myself from saying much about UGC and NAAC, I shall just comment that awarding 3star and 5 star on the basis of one or two days survey makes no sense. UGC certainly lacks feedback system regarding the classes being conducted in departments and colleges particularly related to commerce and humanities. UGC cares two hoots for the payment of visiting faculty which is downright cruel. Further, there is a need to dig into the PhD's that are being done particularly in Humanities. The students and their research appear nowhere near the mark. It would indeed be nice if university examination papers are set outside i.e. by another university. That will truly decide the merit of the students and teachers alike. Partiality and nepotism will then end. I hope, the proposed 'Commission for Higher Studies and Research' go deep into this. This commission should have the facility called 'Ombudsman' to check the growing malpractices in various universities.

4) Regarding scrapping of 10th and 12th exams, the only thing I feel strongly is that students who pass out of school should at least write a few sentences without spelling mistakes. That, there should be either schools or coaching classes. This unnatural pressure that has come on the students and parents must end. This may also bring down the rates of suicides, I feel.

P.S.
As per the news report today, the Bhopal Gang Rape case was a concocted story. Things will get clear in a few days I am sure.

Bhopal Gangrape. Several Unanswered Questions.

Morning of 19 June'09! Almost all newspapers-Local as well as national, carried this wretched news of a 25 yr old woman gangraped by 3 men in a speeding SUV car on the outskirts of Bhopal (M.P.), while the husband was held at gunpoint. Hardly a way to begin a day.It was just very,very bad. Making no sense whatsoever!There were several questions unanswered.

The couple had come from Mumbai to admit their 2 children to Asaram Bapu Ashram School, situated on the outskirts of Bhopal. A boarding school to be precise. Were Mumbai schools not worth considering?

Asaram Bapu Ashram School was in news last year for all the wrong reasons. 2-3 of their students had died under mysterious circumstances. The news was covered by all newspapers and channels. On what basis was this school chosen?

The couple had no one with them at the time of the incident. We don't normally put our children in boardings or hostels unless there is an acquaintance or relative staying. I think schools particularly ask for local guardians. Does it mean that they knew no one there?

The couple, it seems, left the ashram at 8.30 pm. Admission procedure, be it school or college, gets over by 2 or 3 pm. Fine, that the couple wanted to spend some more time with their children. But, were they the only parents around? Normally at such times, there is a buzz of parents and children.

The ashram is on the outskirts of the city and is at a forlon place. In the past few months there have been reports of rape and other such crimes in the particular area. How come no soul in the ashram thought of cautioning them? At such places you often come across some caring person! It is really difficult to believe this.

The ashram being situated at a secluded place must definitely be having a Guest House facility for parents. Or is there no such facility such as a Rest Room or Guest House at the ashram?

Hitching has always had its risks, be it India or anywhere. And taking a lift at night, that too at a place so isolated meant danger most certainly. How did the couple feel that it was all very safe?

Maybe things were to go wrong and that's why it all happened. But, I feel miserable for the young woman. Hope speedy justice is meted out to her. But somewhere I have this terrible feeling that the husband was somewhere involved. Of course I will be happy to be proved wrong. But there is one request I wish to make to all impulsive youngsters-'Please do not play with life'. Blaming police, law courts will not lead to turning back the clock. Rape is a living hell. It can destroy an entire household. Listening to parents and elders is sometimes a wise thing.

The Hidden Talent

My beautician friend suffers from nervous pangs when her clients on visit don't speak. She feels, they are unhappy and will go elsewhere next time! She cites one such example of a client who would come regularly to her for a facial treatment, but not utter a single word. This despite all the talking going about. Just nothing seemed to amuse her- neither the filmy gossip nor the general happenings. " May be she is just plain and simple dull!" snapped an employee. My friend was not convinced. And one day it happened. A newly married girl dropped by. She was in a foul mood for not getting some recipe right. Dropping in at the parlour was a kind of diversion. That's when the lady started speaking. She asked the girl how she had gone about with the recipe. After listening patiently, she offered her some rectifying methods. It came out that the lady was a great cook, with several award winning recipes to her credit.

I have experienced this in my teaching profession too. Those students who show off or talk a lot are disastrous in exams and seminars. It is often the quiet ones that take you by surprise.

They don't fill pages and pages but give you interesting examples. I remember one journalism student writing on Women's Reservation Bill- " If they had wanted, they would have passed it long ago. The fact is nobody wants it!". (It was regarding the 33% reservation for women in the parliament). A real sharp observation from a young boy! At another time a girl explained what 'Interpersonal Conflict' was, when asked about it in Human Communication paper. "It's when I write to my dad for money. And he replies, wait for next month". What a sweet interesting explanation in the midst of boring stereotyped answers.

Naturally students like these score more marks than others. How come the loud talkers show poor wit and presence of mind at such times? Probably, they burn themselves out proving others stupid!

It's the case of, 'Empty vessels make more noise'. Or perhaps, ' Silent waters run deep!'

Brilliant ! Show this performance always Girls.

The 12th class results are out ! And my heartiest congratulations to all the girls who have done brilliantly well in the board exams.



Indeed it is a victorious moment for the society, the social workers - both past and present, the families and most importantly the girls themselves. Indeed there was a time when girls were only expected to do household work. My Salute to Maharshi Karve, Raja Rammohan Roy, Ishwar Chandra Vidyasagar, Swami Vivekanand, Swami Dayanand Saraswati, and all the great social reformers.



The world suddenly seems to be at the feet of these girls. Doors to all careers appear wide open. It's truly a beautiful moment. If only this moment would not pass by! But, try as much there is a sinking feeling that is threatening to destroy my optimism and happiness. My experience of life tells me that now, these girls need to be more observant, decisive and careful. Remember, One swallow does not make a summer. So continued hard work is important. I realise that all these girls must be now 17-18 years. Which means, there is going to be a pressure of marriage after 3-4 years. Well, marriage is a good institution in itself. Provided one gets married to the right person. For, I strongly believe that nothing can be better than a good marriage. And nothing can be worse than a bad marriage.



And so, it would be better to first decide one's aim in a sensible way. By sensible way, I mean, being practical and level headed. Thus, once the career and aim is clear, it would also be possible to choose the right partner. It has to be remembered that once a person is in the right direction, all things fall in right place.



It would certainly be a 'harakiri' to come in merit at one time and then allow every Tom Dick and Harry to take decisions for oneself . This would mean taking a nosedive in life as well as career. It certainly does not help to play down in life- certainly not all one's life. Which means the life-partner has to be of the same wavelength as onself.



So girls, now is the time to sit and understand where you stand and where you want to go.

Miss India 2009 Contest

April 5, 2009 was a Sunday with a difference. I was at home nursing a fractured leg. That's when I came across"Pantaloon Miss India Contest" on Sony TV. And, when my fingers refused to move any further on the remote I realised that this was what I wanted to watch. Certainly a nice shift from my broken leg, from politicians bribing the people for votes, fathers raping their own daughters, and sons killing their own parents.

The programme seemed interesting. The hosts R. Madhavan and Malaika Arora were at their best. So also Swapnil Joshi and Karan Wahi who were the co-hosts. I and my Physiotherapist-daughter( who had dropped down for the weekend to see me) sat down to watch the grand happening.What's more, my husband joined us , even if, for a short while!

The contestants were from various places such as Mumbai, Delhi, Bangalore, Pune, etc. One contest was from Indore. Unfortunately, she didn't make it to the semi-finals. Lack of command over English I guess! But then, an Indore lass making it to the national level was by no means a small achievement. Better luck next time (as my husband always says)! Surprisingly, there were no contestants from Punjab, Gujarat, and the north east regions this time.

What left me spellbound was the height of the girls! No contestant was less than 5ft 7inch. I was reminded of the time when Kiran Juneja and Swaroop Sampat were Miss India. The average height was 5ft 3inch. Even Juhi Chawla was about the same height.

I was however disappointed by the western style of costumes. Saree or Salwar kameez would have any time looked elegant and beautiful on the Indian beauties. "Oh, come on! They are being groomed for the international event." My husband snapped. But then, that's no explanation. We can't dump our national costume this way. International event preparation can always done later. Midway somewhere, the contestants did drape something that had a semblance to sarees.

The judges were an eminent lot- Former Miss Universe Sushmita Sen, Director Madhur Bhandarkar of Page 3 and Chandni Bar fame, Actor Ajay Devgan, the scintillating new stars -Deepika Padukone and Asin Khan.This apart Nandita Mahatani, Ravi Krishnan and Mickey Broadman were also among the judges.

An actor par excellence, Ajay Devgan should do away with that perpetual bored look. But, I do agree that his question," What issue troubles you most today?' did not get a fair answer from Pooja Chopra-the winner of PFMI World 2009 title. The contestant could have touched the woman issue, especially in the light of recent incidents where fathers have emerged as rapists.

Judge Sushmita Sen Asked the same question that was put to her once-What is the essence of being a woman? The answer was disappointing again. Feminity and gentleness are the essence of womanhood. Something which we women are fast losing today. Sushmita Sen had sure given a good answer there and won every one's hearts. Ekta Chowdhry, PFMI Universe 2009 answered very well to the question, "If you were to meet God, what would you ask him and why?" Ekta answered if we are born equal, why is there demarcation in the name of religion. And why is there so much bloodshed.

There was yet another good question-Given a choice, what would you choose-career or family? The PFMI Earth 2009 winner Shreya Kishore gave an all time bad answer when she said, 'career'! Charity begins at home, my dear!

I think that's what makes Sushmita Sen and Aishwarya Rai stand out . The two women are truly great. But then, should we really have Q-A session in beauty pageants? Were Cleopatra, Shakuntala, etc. judged for their sharpness of minds? I think we are mixing the 2 issues and in the process being unfair to both the class of people-the intelligent and the beautiful.

Me thinks, let the beautiful people look beautiful. Ethics and standards should be left to people like Shashi Thiroor, Bachchi Karkaria and others.

Death due to Ragging

My heart felt condolences to Aman Kachru's family. It is really sad that this19 year old boy died due to ragging, in a medical college in Himachal Pradesh.

I really don't have words. It's the person who faces the loss knows what it is. And so I only pray to God to do speedy justice.

There are so many dreams and aspirations when a baby is born. The dreams grow with the child. And if the same child were to get into medical, what better luck could one have! And then suddenly news of death?And all dreams coming crashing down. It is not fair! It is just not fair!

What were those senior boys trying to achieve? And what were all the witnesses (of several days) thinking? That they would relate the tales of ragging with much spice later on? How could the "future doctors " be so cruel and inhuman? I also wish to know how the accused boys secured admission to the medical college. What disturbs me most is how did this ragging last so long? As per me, ragging means a simple question-answer session, which sets a rapport between the seniors and juniors. A bit of song and dance, by which the talent is detected. And finally, this is something which is enjoyed by both the juniors as well as the seniors. And normally, this kind of interaction gets over with the Freshers' Night, i.e. in a month's time. But then, it is best to ban this harmless act also, if decency is going to be trespassed each time.

The academic year is coming to an end soon. At least, next year we should not have cases of ragging or brutality. One thing more. Every hosteler must have a Local Guardian. This should be made compulsory. Secondly, we must have more medical colleges so that students will be nearer their respective homes. How come engineering colleges are dime a dozen? And that, they also succeed in meeting the requirements of the AICTE i.e. All India Council For Technical Education? But the medical colleges invariably fail to meet the expectations of the Medical Council Of India? In fact, a sword always hangs on every medical college. I have seen this in Indore.

Besides this, there is a need for UGC to try and make other courses interesting too. For, there will always be some who will be interested in Chemistry, Economics, etc. The students need to be shown hope here. Besides, the world cannot just run on engineers and doctors. I am sure by working on this aspect, several students will be nearer their homes at the under-graduate level . Naturally, they will be happy, secure and relaxed.

We cannot afford to lose our younger generation this way.

On this note I end ."Happy Gudi Padwa"- Marathi New Year.

Julie and Fiza

The first time Chand -Fiza case hit the headlines, I found some disturbing similarities between Julie and Fiza. Both the girls are extremely good looking. But, while Julie is a natural beauty, Fiza's looks are cultivated. Though of course, I must admit that she has good features.

But whenever I think of Julie, a strange sadness descends on me. A beautiful girl from Bihar who allowed herself to be ruined by Prof. Matuknath, a man fit enough to be her father! Even otherwise, a teacher-student relationship is supposed to be as sublime as a parent-child relationship? In the case of Fiza, I don't feel sorry. I am only filled with disdain.

I agree that both the girls are responsible for causing terrible hurt to the legal wives, which I wonder if God will ever forgive. Of course, I hear now that Chander Mohan alias Chand Mohammed has gone back to his wife and that the Punjab Police have closed the case.

Really, as somebody much older than Julie and much more educated or literate than Julie, ( Assistant Advocate General for Punjab and Haryana Govt. at that!), Fiza should not have fallen into this trap. But then, it is said that love is deaf, dumb and blind! That explains it all I guess. So, here we have two women who have finally gained nothing but bad name. Julie may not agree still, but will surely accept it someday.

The biggest irony is that the two women have got into a mess because of their strong rhetoric.Normally it is people with poor communication skills who suffer at the hands of the world! And indeed, both Julie and Fiza had come up with strange justification when the matter came into the limelight. I remember, the social workers who were trying to drill sense into Julie's head had finally given up. Fiza being much older, advising her was out of question I suppose.

Anyway, the moral of the story is,"too less talking and too much talking are both harmful and dangerous."