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Saturday, February 11, 2012

All is Well. But I Am Scared...

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Yes, I am too scared to even acknowledge to myself that all is well! Supposing things go wrong?
Life was tough...very tough. May be it is so with everybody. But my life is my life! And I know what I have gone through.
I hated to work when the children were small. I had reserved all my career dreams for later years when the children would be grown and not need me. But imagine! When this phase arrived, I didn't even know!
And last week, when I paid visit to my old ad agency, the Director remarked, "Now what's holding you?" Your children are grown up. Your husband is occupied. So now, what is the problem?"
I really had no answer. That instant my brain too reasoned with me, "Yes, what's the problem?"
A small fear hidden deep within me raised a doubt as usual, "What if things go wrong..."
The thought was scary... very scary...
I must thank my Director who said authoritatively,"You have already wasted a lot of your time. It's high time joined back."
And so it happened! My brain stopped the hidden fear from striking again. Next minute I heard myself saying, "I'll join from next week."
I have joined back my agency. I am happy doing my job. Hope I am not filled with fear again! Somewhere I must learn to say to myself atleast... That All Is Well!